Sometimes, I think it’s hard for friends and family to relate to our adoption because we don’t have a due date. We don’t even have a timeframe to share. And besides me getting bigger from eating a lot, it’s not visible that we will have another baby. The adoption process involves many steps, requires lots of paperwork and is not necessarily easy to follow. Someone once said: It’s like going through a divorce, moving countries all by yourself, battling a rare disease or running your own business – if you haven’t had to deal with it, you simply can’t know what it feels like. So I want to shed a bit of light and give you a better understanding of how we are preparing for adoption, where we stand, how much every step costs and what’s supposed to happen next. (Take a look at my posts about Adoption Myth Busters Part One and Two to gain further understanding of the complex process of adoption.)
We submitted a pre-application to our agency (read more about our choice of adoption agency here) and attended an orientation meeting (via conference call). Currently, Paul and I are completing a list of education requirements: Read books, take online courses and watch videos while completing exercises. Once all books are read, courses completed and questionnaires filled out, we will submit an official application to our agency along with $500. Considering that we will get approved, we then move on to the family assessment or home study.
Home studies differ by agency, state and country. For us, the home study consists of home visits by a social worker, interviews (joint and separate), training, health statements, income statements, lots of document gathering action, background checks, a day-long Education Seminar and references. The above steps then conclude with a home study report written by the social worker. On average, the home study takes between 3 and 6 months to complete and will cost us about $3,000 (including document processing and such). In addition, the administrative agency fee of $10,500 is due. At this time, we will be able to apply for adoption grants.
All throughout our adoption (and likely even after a baby is placed with us), we will be raising funds to cover all of our adoption fees and expenses. Adopting – whether domestically or internationally – is incredibly expensive. We are looking at roughly $29,000. Only by faith and with the generous help of others, we will be able to afford our adoption. We have saved up a decent amount of money but are far from having all the funds we will need available to us. Our fundraising efforts are proving to be a great bonding experience for Mr. Thrasher and I. Even Emma has been excited about helping out. (Emma’s Lemonade Stand is now famous in our neighborhood.) And we believe that it opens up the opportunity for friends and family to get involved and become a vital part of our adoption journey. Even if you can’t donate, you can share our story, educate others about adoption or simply pray for us, our baby and the expectant mother who will be choosing us to raise her child. Find out what else you could do to help us make a home for a baby and visit our Fundraising page.
Soon enough it will be time to prepare our adoptive family profile. This will be one of the most important first impressions we will ever make on any expectant mother/parent who is considering to make an adoption plan. It will address expectant mothers/parents talk about our likes, our goals and dreams, how we met, how we raise Little Thrasher, why we want to adopt, how we celebrate holidays, who our friends are, what our home, our church, our city looks like and much more. It will be an introduction to the expectant mother/parents and allows them to get to know us as a potential forever family for their child. It basically has to accomplish two things:
- Share relevant information about our family and
- Paint a picture of what a life with the Thrashers would be like for a child.
Once we have written, designed, printed, shared, uploaded and sent out our family profile, we will be officially ‘a waiting family’. Waiting to be chosen to give a baby a loving home and family.
(to be continued)
